The littlest of the littles is on the move...crawling that is. Not far,but just enough to get himself stuck under the coffee table and let out little whimpers until I scoop him up and set him on another course. And we have a birthday today. A sweet blonde haired boy turns six today.
It seems like only yesterday that I was watching him learn how to crawl across the floor... sigh. These are the final days of public school this week and next. In my heart I am caught between joy, fear and longing. Joyful to be done with the standardized rituals and testing. Fear comes in the form of anxiety...notbeing sure I will ever be able to do it and still have my kids love me when it's all over. And longing...a longing for those elementary school milestones. Will they miss our on the school plays, the yearly photos? I pray about this daily. My decision is made, but I still worry that it's the right one. My faith needs to strengthen in this task because He set this path before me and I want to fulfill His will. It will all be okay.....breathe......breathe......breathe.
I've taken to sleeping on the family room couch as Lucas is finally sleeping in his crib and his room is too far for comfort from our master bedroom. So the couch has been my bed for some time. And perchance if he wakes in the middle of the night and needs to snuggle, we just curl up together in the spare bedroom until the sun rises. Thankfully he is sleeping through the night because one week ago we became parents to a different kind of baby...a furry one, or two. Two to be exact. Siberian Husky and Australian Shephard mix pups. So sweet....and FUZZY. Gabe is brown and white and definitely has more Husky in him. Buck is black and white and will probably have husky ears but a Shephard face. They were only five weeks when they came to us, but they are doing amazingly well. They already use their paper inside for" messes" and "go" everytime we go out. A few howling episodes here and there, but mostly, just amazingly well mannered. We are working on the "sit" command this week.
It really has been a busy past week. We finished the new chicken coop and moved the new hens and roosters in. Two of our hens and one of the roosters left with a table and chairs as a trade for the pups. Lol, bartering, I suppose. Pepper spent two nights in the pen, but she was being a bit of a bully to the new girls so I let her out to free range. She sleeps on the deck handrail right outside the back window....sigh. The nursery is also in the process of receiving some new (and much needed) flooring. I opted to piece in the carpet (again) in the family room as my master plan is to put laminate down in there too. All in due time. There are still so many unfinished projects (the master bath trim, the kids bedroom trimwork and that unfinished reading nook I had great aspirations for, the music room and then there is the everchanging craft/homeschool room). It will all get done and it will be as it is supposed to be. No worrying allowed here.
Between projects I am personally working on me. Yes, me. My role as a parent, working on having a chilled reaction to these angry outbursts from Madison. Working on not getting overwhelmed when they all come at me at once needing something. I am working on teaching them to be a little more independent and a little less messy. And I am working on not freaking out when everything isn't in it's place. Can you imagine? This is in my daily prayers. Pray for me too, please. But for now, I burn lavender incense to infuse some calm into the house. Not sure if it helps or just makes me sneeze!