rabbits and storage and cold, oh my!

This morning I was greeted by a bright sun streaming through the back windows of the house after two days of bitter cold rain.  .  The cold remains I learned as I went out to feed the chickens this morning and was met with a biting wind as soon as I opened the screen door.  I've grown unaccustomed to the cold being here for the past two years.  It reminds me of home....sigh.  But I do so love the sun.  So the thermostat was turned down and the curtains drawn back to warm up the house naturally. 

The girls (chickens) water bowl was frozen over this morning...had to punch through to refill it.  They crowded around me as I did so, clucking and clattering the whole time.  They are such silly birds.  I know they are mad because they want to be out...but I am tired of cleaning off the deck, lol.  The rest of the herd of cats and kittens were fed in the warmth of the shed.  These cats kills me, they lay on the deck,out in the cold and don't go into the shed to sleep.  Strange.  Rosebud is getting bigger and fluffier.   I wish she were a boy.  She will most definitely have to be spayed, along with the two other females.  11 is enough. 

I'm researching rabbit pens.  Seems the one I bought needs a drop pan and legs that will add another $40 to the bill..but then I can use it indoors or out.  If I go with the smaller one, I fear it won't be enough room for our new pet.  Once it's outside we will have to build some type of top over it to protect it from the elements.  I probably should have just bought a standard hutch and been done with it.  It probably would have been about the same till all is said and done. 

The upstairs is coming along.  I fear I am going to have to repaint the girls side.  I apparently didn't mix the paint well enough and there appears to be several shades of pink rolled onto the wall.  Could I just say I meant for it to be that way??  I have two boxes of trash to come down yet and yesterday was spent hauling storage totes to the girls room closet (their new home).  I did manage to condense a good bit, but the Halloween costumes need to be transferred to a flat storage box.  Those big totes take up so much space!  If the weather stays non rainy, Sunday is cleaning day for the shed, then the other totes will be moved out there.  Oh, how I wish we had a garage!!

Yesterday I re organized my bathroom closet, and my entire kitchen.  I moved all my small appliances to the closet and moved the food storage to a base cabinet.  I think this will work well but I think I still want a big pantry closet in the laundry room for bigger items like paper towels and such.  All in due time.  It's amazing how you can repurpose and change things around and spend zero money to organize, lol.  I's all about using your imagination and thinking outside the box.  I abhor clutter is drives me mad.  I've been scouring Pinterest for ideas for the kids room...for closets and storage for toys.  There's so much out there, but I want to spend zero money so I will have to improvise with what I have.  I have to remind myself that our house isn't going to be on BHG so it doesn't always have to be matchy matchy.  We live here!  I need to stop trying to live up to the expectation that my house will always be spotless.  It won't be.  I have 5 kids that need to be allowed to be messy and play.  Let it go and breathe. 

sue

is it really 2014?

Ok, so 2013 is over.  It went out with a big bright ball crashing hoorah, while my co workers and I stood in room 1 of the ED devoid of hats or noisemakers, knee deep in patients with the flu.  And so we welcomed in 2014.  I hugged my friends Kari and Linda, and off we went, praying for the night to JUST BE OVER.  .

I made some resolutions.  Easy one's I think.  Or well maybe practical ones'.

Take a family trip.
Save 10%  of our paychecks and put it into an account...no touching!
Find a church.
Improve my sewing and crochet skills.
Live Dr. Markhum's advice on parenting.
Plant and maintain a vegetable garden.

Not too bad.  I know it's more than one, but it's more like my goal list for 2014.  2013 wasn't so bad.  We had good moments (Lucas :)) and not so good moments (Frazier's stroke, the bathroom disaster, and an $11,000 bill).  But we survived and we are still here. Intact. A family with it's problems and it's better days.  I hope 2014 brings forgiveness, acceptance, gratitude, mended fences, and simplicity. 

blessings all!

sue

onward..

New Years came and went while I was stuck at work. I quick pre countdown call to my hubby, and a Happy New Year wish to each of my kids...then me and some of the other staff met in room 1 and watched that big bright ball drop down in Times Square while we stood knee deep in patients here in our little South Georgia ER.  And so we welcomed in 2014. 

I laid in my soft bed the next morning, drinking a post work beer and thought about the past year and the upcoming year.  Had I met any of my goals?  Yes.  I did. But there is always more to do. more goals to set.  Which leads me to my NY Resolution list.  Do you have one?

take a family trip
find a church
save 10% of our earnings
plant and maintain a vegetable garden
become a better parent
improve my sewing and crochet skills
improve my computer skills

so I sit here tonight, after my first full day in 2014, Willie is crooning away on Pandora drifting me backwards in time and to a gentler place. I so hope my children have good happy memories.  I dare say I wish I had been born in the 50;s when time may have been harder, but they were simpler. I so long for that simple, uncluttered, no gadget, no social media place. A place where I didn't know what anyone was doing unless I called them and they told me.  I almost wish to be invisible.  I suppose I could if I just left Facebook.  lol. 

we are getting a bunny. Rmma has already named him/her Sugarbear.  I'm going with Snickers. I swore he would be outside, but I'm thinking I will get an inside pen. he's a pet right? 

I painted the upstairs this week.  I have more work to do. i'ts overwhelming going thru all the stuff up there.  we had a throw out party tonight.  purging is good for the soul.  I'm so looking forward to getting everything in it's right spot.  I put away the Christmas stuff tonight too. I got it down to 5 boxes ..mainly flat storage boxes.  That's a mighty big deal to me.  My Halloween costumes are still taking up too much space lol.  Oh well, it's a work in progress. 

I welcome 2014.  We had our ups and downs in 2013. Many blessings more than anything else. 
God is good. I hope that 2014 brings mended fences, love, patience, acceptance, and being present in the moment. 

Blessings
sue

bitten

Dare I say I have been bitten by the homeschooling bug?  I have been devouring Pinterest information, books, quotes about homeschooling all week!  It all makes perfect sense to me...it really does.  It just feels right, like something I'm being drawn to do. 

Let me back up and tell you why.  Jacob struggles a bit at school.  He has some special education classes, he has been returned to mainstream classes, but the SE teacher comes into class with him.  We held him back a year when we moved to Georgia two years ago and it was a good thing.  But he's in 3rd grade this year...one of the toughest years in elementary school I think, and he's not happy.  Or maybe I'm not happy.  I see him failing his tests, so they retest him with the teacher and he then passes...but I question whether he has truly learned anything.  I'm starting to understand and see how this "putting everyone in a box" and the conformity of it all is just, well...I don't know...stupid.  Maybe he's not ready to learn that yet.  Why does he have to know all his multiplication facts by next year?  When he doesn't get it and I get frustrated he gets angry and upset.  Sure, I have to learn to respond better and be more encouraging....but is all this anxiety worth it? Is the anxiety of getting homework done with 3 kids every single night worth it?  Are they going to use any of what they are learning in the real world? 

I'm scared.  Scared I won't be able to teach all of them, but it seems with a lot of the research I've been doing, my job would be more of a facilitator.  I feel like Jacob would welcome the idea, Emma and Sam I'm not so sure about. Mostly for Sam because he would no longer ride the bus and that is his favorite part of it all!  I see Sam getting into trouble for well, just being a kid and not conforming to their rules.   So he wanted to go to the library and get a book.  He should be allowed to.  There is no freedom in school.  And I worry about the social side of it, both ways really.  I worry what they are subjected to at school.  I so don't want children who are so hell bent on fitting in.  As much as I am neurotic about organization, I love the idea of independent thinking and creative expression.  Lol, those two definitely don't go hand in hand!

So I'm on the search now for a homeschooling group or co-op here in Statesboro. That would satisfy the social side for me....to be linked in with a like minded group of people.  I'm looking for a mentor, someone to talk to that can encourage this mama to do what just feels right in her heart. After all, these little ones aren't going to be little for so long and every chance I get, I want to be there and watch them blossom.

sue

water

Winter has reared it's cold head here in the past few days, dropping our temperatures from the 70-80's down into the 40's in a matter of hours. Late Monday night I was able to soak in a nice hot bath (much awaited for as our bathroom is finally completed!).  The water was warm , the room filled with the scent of lavender....and then it dawned on me.  This would be a perfect time to give Lucas his first real bath.  A soak in the tubby kind of bath.  See, I had only been sponge bathing him as I found I absolutely hated the infant tub I purchased for him.  Plus, he's just so little and it only takes a moment to clean him right up. 

So with Amos Lee wafting through the air via Pandora on my cell phone, a little chubby baby was gingerly handed down into his mother's arms and into the warm inviting water.  He cried at first and I worried the water was still to warm, but I held him and ever gently swayed him in the water, he relaxed completely in my arms.  He floated like that for a while, every so often smiling up at me.  I bathed him off so gently and poured handful of warm water over his little body and hair.  He was so sweet, chubby and warm.  His expression so filled with adoration.  He just melts my heart and all the anxiety of the day just washed away. 

sue

present

I sat and watched his sweet little face, nestled against my breast...safe and satisfied and my heart overflowed with love for this little boy.

I used to not cherish and stop and enjoy the everyday moments of  my children.  I'd grown to just speed through the day, trying to get everything accomplished that I felt needed to be done.  Then along came Lucas, the last of 6 babies and that all changed.  My heart breaks when I realize the enormity of him.  He is the last, the last chance I have of reveling in all the normal baby love I had taken for granted.  It won't be repeated.  And that gives me a sense of overwhelming sadness, but there is something else.  Gratitude.  Thankfulness that I have learned to slow down, stop and appreciate, stop and watch and listen, but most of all enjoy. 

I realize too, that all these other little monkeys running around here won't be here forever.  They will grow up and become adults, not be so needy, and noisy and well, all the things little kids do to drive you mad.  I want them to remember a childhood filled with love and fun and the presence of their parents.  I don't want them to think their mother had an extra electronic appendage attached to her hand (lol, cell phones drive me crazy!!) I want to focus not on the outside world, but this one little special, sweet, messy world that I call mine. 

You see, you can't create that dream childhood you have in your head for your children being so preoccupied with all those other obligations you think you must attend to.  Phones, schedules, work, cleaning.  Yes, it all has to be done, taken care of, but not at the loss to our children.  I often found that when I did have free time, I didn't spend it playing with my children.  I spent it trying to keep them from messing up the house I had just cleaned.  Kids are kids, they are messy and I had to get over it. 

I admit I post pictures all the time on FB and I take tons of everyday pictures of my kids.  Our family is far from us, so its a way to connect our everyday with them.  To let them see their grandkids.  We often live our lives via these social sites..."look at me", "look at what I am doing with my kids today".....it shouldn't be about keeping up with the Jones' or proving to anyone that you are a great parent because you took your kids here there and everywhere.  Focus on the moment.  Forget the pictures.  Forget sharing.  Relish in the time with you kids.  Listen to them. 

For me, it's all about being PRESENT for my children.  I'm not better than a cardboard cutout standing in the kitchen if I'm only present to them physically.  I have to connect with them on all levels, physical, emotional, and mental.  Then maybe that dream childhood I have for them just may come true.

sue

Do you have a To Do list?

I know I do!  Some of the items on my list have to be repeated weekly or monthly.  Other's are one time deals.  I am a huge fan of lists because it keeps me on track and gives me a sense of accomplishment when I cross another item off!

My To Do List:  November

 

trim front trees

trim trees around pond

Remove moulding in master bath

re-tile floor in master bath

repair hole in upstairs wall

replace missing tiles in laundry room

cover lemon and lime trees for winter

dig fencepost holes for garden fence

build 8 4x8 raised beds at garden site

finish pergola

pick up limbs along driveway

trim rosebushes

mulch garden bed

remove pepper plants to compost

rebuild compost bin

clean off deck and seal

build firepit base

firepit façade

clean out tool shed

mulch around fruit trees

clean out chicken pen

 

Do you have a list?

 

Have a busy and wonderful day!

Sue